I will preface this blog by saying that anyone who knows me, knows I love grand gestures and romance. It’s built into my DNA. Let’s face it, there is no better feeling than love. I also know how hard the act of romance can be for some people, but it’s critical to your connection because it is an experience reserved for 2.
That said, yesterday, while driving down Sahara, listening to the Morning Mashup I was a bit annoyed with the topic of conversation. For those not in the cool kids club yet, the MM is a funny morning show on Sirius XM; highly recommend it. The hosts were talking to people about whether they were excited for Valentine’s Day. Few said yes. Most said, “I don’t care about this day, and don’t need some arbitrary day to be romantic.” Ummm … yes you do, and here’s why.
Holidays are opportunities to break away from our work for a few consecutive hours and reinvest in our personal lives. The best part is that others share this philosophy, so your boss won’t actually get all that mad if you shut off your phone for the night. You can’t say this for very many days on the calendar.
That’s what Valentine’s and other holidays are all about … reconnecting.
You also need Valentine’s Day because even those perfect relationships have imperfect moments. Unplugging allows you to really give yourself to the other person without any sort of distraction. If you don’t see that as valuable, I hope you enjoy lawyers, and alimony. Without deeply connecting in the few moments we get to actually do just that, we get lost out there in the world. Basically, relationships require just as much commitment as a job does. If you don’t put in the work to ensure you’re treating your special someone right on Feb 14, you’re missing an opportunity at “getting a promotion”.
The mind is a fickle thing. Attention is required by even the most introverted people. I’m not saying you have to rent a horse drawn carriage, or book a trip to Bora Bora, but do something, ANYTHING to make the person who has to put up with your shit at the worst of times smile. Here’s my tips to a successful last minute celebration, or Valentine’s on a budget:
All phones off.
Cook dinner together with some Coldplay, Jack Johnson or Boyz II Men in the background; whatever your combined style of slow jams is.
Play a game with a sexy spin.
Watch a romcom. Guys, suck it up ... maybe you'll learn something and if you just get off your testosterone injected horse for a minute you'll find the humour in it. Or, if neither of you like romcoms, pick something you’ll both enjoy.
Be playful while the movie is on.
Have sex, but that new new kind of sex. Don't do what you've always done. That is if you’re into that sort of thing.
DO NOT end the night without telling each other how you feel. Become eloquent for a few minutes. It won’t kill you.
Long story short, take this opportunity, and really immerse yourself in Valentine’s Day. It doesn’t matter if you go all out, or just make home life better for a few hours. The world is trying to do the same thing, so take advantage of this moment of serenity, leave work at the office, and explore who you are as a couple tonight. If you don’t, you may end up wishing you had.
Oh, and if you’re single (like I am), relax on the V-Day hate. Eventually you’ll have someone, and Feb 14 won’t be a curse on your soul.